Dad of Divas' Reviews: Book Review - Crazy Things Parents Text

Monday, July 18, 2011

Book Review - Crazy Things Parents Text

About the Book
Parents say the darndest things when they are talking with their thumbs (or with their index finger one…letter…at…a…time). Texting has opened up a whole new channel of communication between parents and their children and the result is, well, a collection of LOL, TMI, and WTF!

To celebrate the launch of their upcoming book, Crazy Things Parents Text (ISBN: 9781402266256; September 2011; $10.99 U.S. / £6.99 UK; Humor; Trade Paper), authors Stephen and Wayne Miltz are launching a search for the funniest parent text on their popular website The winning text will be published in the new book!

Just submit the craziest thing your parent has texted you on between June 1 and June 5. Starting June 6, the Top 10 selections will be posted and visitors to the website can vote for their favorite. Voting ends at midnight on June 9. The winning selection will be featured in the book, Crazy Things Parents Text, this fall.

Crazy Things Parents Text is a collection of the best all-new, user-submitted parent texts from the web's #1 parent texting website, The book walks parents and children through:

The Seven Phases of Textual Maturity

Phase 1: Lost in Translation – This is the learning stage when parents cannot seem to locate the space bar, misuse acronyms (or make up their own), shout at us in ALL CAPS, or send along half dialed or unreadable autocorrected texts.

Mom: Hey sweetie, Grandma just died…LOL
Me: WTF mom? What’s funny about that
Mom: I thought it meant “lots of love”?

Phase 2: I Meant to Send That to Your Father – This is the stage where insexts begin. They can type, but haven’t quite mastered sending the right text to the three contacts in their phone, so it’s Russian roulette as to who will receive those naughty texts that are just TMI!

Mom: Pack the video camera and we can make another “film” in the hotel room
Mom: Sorry Hun that was for your Dad
Me: Eww Mom seriously?
Mom: Don’t watch Land Before Time DVD while we’re gone

Phase 3: Teaching Life Lessons – Now they feel guilty for insexting, so they’re going to turn it around by being good, decent parentsagain and offering advice in their texts.

Me: I hate my jobL
Mom: You know, there’s a support group for that. It’s called EVERYBODY, and they meet at the bar.

Phase 4: Did You Really Just Text Me That?! – Now parents are really comfortable texting you…and start to communicate constantly. Unfortunately, in this phase, the comfort level overcomes the filter and they freely text with reckless abandon.

Dad: Where are you?
Me: At the Justin Bieber movie premiere DUH!
Dad: Like oh my gawwddd have a good time.
Me: wow Dad…you just killed it..

Phase 5 and Phase 6: Dad and Mom for the Win – This is the resentful stage after you’ve stopped returning their texts because they were too much. Dad is usually the first to reinstate his dominance, with Mom not far behind, and they come back with a vengeance that you gotta respect.

Me: You owe me $350 for the ipad.
Dad: Ok. You owe me hundreds of thousands for your entire life.

Me: Ha ha ha! You should learn from your mistakes.
Mom: Yeah, that’s why I only had one kid.

Phase 7: Equals at Long Last – We have finally reached textual maturity, where both parties are adept at texting and insulting each other. That’s what true friends do, right?

Me: Hey!
Dad: Aren’t you supposed to be at school?
Me: Aren’t you supposed to be at work?
Dad: Touche… draws 8 million page views a month, and is averaging well over 50,000 unique visitors per day.

About the Authors
Wayne Miltz is 30 years old and lives in Raleigh, North Carolina. He enjoys graphic design and is an Internet geek at heart. In 2007 he invested in Miltz Media. His mornings begin with surfing through his favorite blogs looking for witty posts to humor him. Off the web, he enjoys both tennis and aviation.

Stephen Miltz is 25 years old and lives in Chapel Hill, North Carolina, where he recently graduated from the University of North Carolina with a degree in business management. He manages the business and content ends of the website.

My Take on the Book

This book was simply hilarious! I was laughing throughout the book and was amazed at some of the things that these parents would say through text message. I could not have seen me saying similar things in any sense, but I guess that this was why the book was as funny as it was. 

As I was going through this book it made me think about why my parents should not be using text messaging. At least my parents are somewhat tech savvy so I have not had any problems (as of yet) with some of the things that these parents shared on their phones, but that does not mean that it will not happen in the future!

A funny book for all! 

All opinions expressed in this review are my own and not influenced in any way by the company.  Any product claim, statistic, quote or other representation about a product or service should be verified with the manufacturer or provider. Please refer to this site's Disclaimer  for more information. I have been compensated or given a product free of charge, but that does not impact my views or opinions.
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