Book Review - You Are Not a Sh*tty Parent: How to Practice Self-Compassion and Give Yourself a Break

About the Book
In You Are Not a Sh*tty Parent: How to Practice Self-Compassion and Give Yourself a Break of course you think you’re doing a sh*tty job. Every parent does. It’s pretty much a byproduct of our society, with its incessant demands coupled with the in-your-face competitiveness parents see on social media. Unfortunately, the pandemic only made things worse, as parents juggled the stresses of helping their kids navigate online schooling while they also had to work from home. All of which makes Carla Naumburg’s new book utterly necessary. Author of How to Stop Losing Your Sh*t with Your Kids, with 149,000 copies in print, Naumburg delivers her message right up front—You Are Not a Sh*tty Parent—that all parents need to hear and believe in. And she does it with her singular understanding, relatably funny voice, and keen insights. 

 You don’t react calmly to every situation? That doesn’t make you a sh*tty parent. You’d rather hide in the back of the closet than play dolls with your child (because you hate dolls)—nope, doesn’t mean you’re a sh*tty parent. The fact is, great parenting is not the same thing as perfect parenting. Great parenting starts with true self-compassion, the kind that means you don’t judge yourself. Harnessing this self-compassion is the key to giving yourself a break and embracing your best qualities as a parent. There are four evidence-based elements of self-compassion—noticing, connection, curiosity, and compassion of course—and Naumburg gives tangible steps for how to use each to help parents reduce their anxiety, trust their instincts, move past the guilt and become a calmer, more confident parent. Which, in the end, benefits your child as much as you.

My Take on the Book
This book was a fun way to look at parenting. Any parent knows that there are times where we all will feel like bad parents but that does not mean that we are. This book really makes you look inwards to reinvent the way that you think about yourself and about parenting. The nice thing is that the author really validates parents and lets us acknowledge what it is like to be a parent and helps us to know that it is ok to be the parent that we are and that we can give ourselves the recognition that we deserve. 

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