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Saturday, January 15, 2011

REVIEW of James Lehman's Total Transformation DISC 2 "Why Won't My Child Listen to Me?"

James Lehman, in his Total Transformation program (DISC 2), says that parents have a pictured of the ideal child that they hope to have even before they have a child. Lehman states that  parents want a child who listens and is respectful, but many times they have a child who has other ideas. In any case, all children, especially those who challenge authority, require a firm and consistent parent who will help him or her learn to manage his behavior on his own.
I liked the idea that you have to look at parenting as running a factory and answer the question about What type of product should your factory produce. Once you identify this, you need to identify what you have to do to get the product you want out of your factory.

Lehman also describes in disc 2 the idea of the ineffectiveness of "Over Negotiating." You tell Tommy that it’s time to go to bed. Well, he doesn’t want to go to bed. He wants to watch television. This begins  the negotiation pattern that becomes so common between a parent and child. What Lehman brings out in this CD is that many parents who over negotiate, teach their child that, “I don’t mean what I say the first time. I need your input to make a decision.” This is not a scenario that you want to be in as a parent.

Due to this negotiation, parents tend to find that their children won’t listen to you the first time? It may be because the parents have created a negotiation framework between them and their child. Lehman does explain that there is a fine line here because what he is referring to is Over-Negotiation. There are definitely times when parents will need to negotiate on things such as clothes to wear, movie to go see, etc. In many situations, asking for your child’s input is a good practice. This communicates love and value to your child. When parents to over negotiate, the parent is giving the child too much power in important areas. So, instead of the parent making a decision in the best interest of the child, the child gets his way a lot more than he should.

Overall, this CD explains that when you say something, you must mean it, and expect your child to follow through. Anything less, drastically throws off the balance of power and the child gains a foothold in areas that should be left exclusively to parental decision making.

More specifics and purchasing information for The Total Transformation can be found on their website or on Amazon!


All opinions expressed in this review are my own and not influenced in any way by the company.  Any product claim, statistic, quote or other representation about a product or service should be verified with the manufacturer or provider. Please refer to this site's Disclaimer  for more information. I have been compensated or given a product free of charge, but that does not impact my views or opinions.
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